Undescribable (Undescribable, #1) - Shantel Tessier DNF at 50%

I tried, really, I honestly did. Unfortunately, I had to cut my losses before I threw my kindle at the wall.

I'll refrain from rating it since I never finished.

Now for those that are easily offended, I recommend you avert your eyes from this review, because this might be a slight rant.

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You've been warned!

What initially attracted me to the book was the description of Slade:
attorney by day and a cocky, foul mouth playboy by night. All girls want Slade Long, but not one has ever been able to keep his attention for long. Having a different woman in his bed every night is how he prefers it-no emotion, no connection.

Yes, I have a certain weak spot for foul-mouthed playboys. But Slade did not deliver on the promise.

Slade is a successful criminal attorney and a complete asshole when it comes to women (I also have a slight weakness for the assholes. What? They're hot! Whatever! Don't judge me)
Yet here we have this ultimate playboy that jumps from woman to woman getting obsessed with a girl he has never even met, all from hearing her voice on a phone.
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Right then. Ok. Sure. Moving on...

Sam. Oh poor little naive Sam. She irritated me to no end. She is dating a guy for 8 mo, Jax. However, Jax and her have been having problems lately. He isn't as attentive to her, and would rather go out and party then spend time with her. (red flag, maybe?)
So when Jax calls her to inform her that he will be going to a party at the house of the most infamous playboy in town, Slade, she tries to brush it off. Then when he's still not home by 4 am, she gets worried. Why you ask? Well because what if he's hurt or gotten into an accident somewhere? Really!

She calls Slade to check on her boyfriend. Slade, being complete captivated by her voice, feels the need to leave the chick in his bed and go check on Sam's boyfriend. When he walks in and sees him in bed with another girl, he doesn't tell Sam, since he doesn't know what their situation really is, he doesn't feel it right to get involved in the middle of a problem between 2 people that are ultimately strangers to him.

Sam finally learns that Jax is cheating on her, when she catches him in the act. But then when she finds out that Slade knew and didn't tell her, she gets mad at him. I really couldn't wrap my mind around that. Right, makes perfect sense in blaming a complete stranger for not wanting to get involved in your personal drama.

This was a case of almost insta-love, which I just cannot stand in books.

Slade went from womanizer to wanting a relationship with Sam in the blink of an eye. Oh and he was pretty much in love with her after 3 days together. It just didn't seem realistic at all.

Then there was Slade's little habit of referring to Sam as "Angel". This gets OBNOXIOUSLY repetitive. He calls her that every other sentense. I'm all for endearments, but that's ALL he calls her. This doesn't happen mearely when he speaks to her, oh no! She's referred as Angel in descriptive sentences too.
Angel reaches down for her purse on the floor.

It was always Angel this and Angel that..
"Do you know what I want?" I ask Angel.

"I need to kiss you, Angel"

GAH!
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Slade also had a habit for apologizing for EVERYTHING at EVERY turn. Which drove me ALMOST as crazy as his "angel" habit.

Sam, I'm pretty sure had a drinking problem. The girl would drink by herself as she was getting ready. And I'm not even talking a glass of wine here. I'm talking pretty much almost drunk by the time she actually went out.
I'm on my third glass and my second outfit. The more I drink, the sexier my outfit gets.

Every time she got pissed or upset, she would drink, and keep drinking, and then drink some more.

Half the time I wanted to reach through my kindle and smack some sense into the girl. The other half I just wanted to throw my damn kindle at the wall.
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The book seemed drawn out, and I kept losing more and more interest the more I read. I couldn't connect with the story or the characters at all. The hero and heroine came off as shallow and two-dimensional. Finally when I got to the 50% mark and was still bored out of my ever loving mind, and still felt like I wanted to beat both the hero and heroine, I knew I had to cut my losses.

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Suddenly I'm feeling a need for a few glasses of wine myself

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